Where I am?
Am I lost?
Where to find the answers?
Where to get over the mistrust?
Where to do when you get there?
Where to go when you feel?
How to speak up face to face?
Why do I still conceal?
Where to hide my face then?
Where to NOT show my shame?
Where to find solace perhaps?
Where to put all the blame?
Why do this happens?
Why does it happen again?
How does this thing go wrong?
Why am I always in vain?
How do I find the precious?
How do I avoid the strife?
Why do I lie again?
How do I live the life?
What is this going to be like...
When this goes on and on again...
Will I even recognise myself...
When I come from the other end of the game.
Chaos...
Like Oil flows into Water...
The medley is quite a sight
Derangement...
Like Flowers smile in the light...
But Somehow...something's not right..
Confusion...
Bit of like a steal of rays...
In the morning ; but it is still night...
Turmoil...
Standing near the edge of yourself
The ripples; they dance and shine bright...
What did I just write?????????????
Monday, April 28, 2008
Friday, April 18, 2008
An excellent composition
I was watching V for Vendetta this veekend and had the luck to come acoss one of the most brilliantly written pieces of dialogue I have ever come across..
Given here is the Introduction of V(the main protagonist) to Evey (the main heroine):-
Given here is the Introduction of V(the main protagonist) to Evey (the main heroine):-
V: Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of Fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is it vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished, as the once vital voice of the verisimilitude now venerates what they once vilified. However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose vis-à-vis an introduction, and so it is my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V!
Evey: Are you like a crazy person?
Evey: Are you like a crazy person?
Vell vhat to say.... VOW!!!
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Psychology of Decision....
What is a decision?
It is the logical answer to an query put by your active mind to your passive mind...
We all experience and know that our executive and the logical parts are two almost tangibly separate parts of our nervous system. Also these two parts take input from another parts of our psych. That is Physical Input(Conditions), Mental Input(Feeling), Psychological Input(Instinct), A Random Input(Luck), and a Heuristic Input (Experience). (At this point it is wondrous indeed to see.... so many inputs all condenses to give a right decision...The brain is indeed a wondrous piece of machinery)
So... Whenever we are confronted with a situation , a very complex neurochemical process initiates.
Our body tenses up.Even if we don't know.The brain searches for previous occurrences of the incident.We try to see some sense and act on intuition and of course ....luck .... is also a random function of the brain.
The Order of Preference of this working is:- Physical,Mental,Heuristic,then Psychological and Random.
How to make the right decision?
There is no Golden rule for making good decision rather it is the very opposite of making good decision that will help you being a better decision maker. If you make bad decision the full extent of your actions are beared by you. You alone bear the full brunt of the force. So that is why we see the children who are spoon fed all there life , rarely turn out to be good decision makers in their adult life. Remember...Experiences have the 3rd most priority in your decision making...
Don't shy away from making decisions. You are merely incapabling yourself to be a better decision maker.......experiences good or bad teach you.....Rather I'd say bad experiences teach you more.....
It is the logical answer to an query put by your active mind to your passive mind...
We all experience and know that our executive and the logical parts are two almost tangibly separate parts of our nervous system. Also these two parts take input from another parts of our psych. That is Physical Input(Conditions), Mental Input(Feeling), Psychological Input(Instinct), A Random Input(Luck), and a Heuristic Input (Experience). (At this point it is wondrous indeed to see.... so many inputs all condenses to give a right decision...The brain is indeed a wondrous piece of machinery)
So... Whenever we are confronted with a situation , a very complex neurochemical process initiates.
Our body tenses up.Even if we don't know.The brain searches for previous occurrences of the incident.We try to see some sense and act on intuition and of course ....luck .... is also a random function of the brain.
The Order of Preference of this working is:- Physical,Mental,Heuristic,then Psychological and Random.
How to make the right decision?
There is no Golden rule for making good decision rather it is the very opposite of making good decision that will help you being a better decision maker. If you make bad decision the full extent of your actions are beared by you. You alone bear the full brunt of the force. So that is why we see the children who are spoon fed all there life , rarely turn out to be good decision makers in their adult life. Remember...Experiences have the 3rd most priority in your decision making...
Don't shy away from making decisions. You are merely incapabling yourself to be a better decision maker.......experiences good or bad teach you.....Rather I'd say bad experiences teach you more.....
Thursday, April 3, 2008
4 months without a break in KGP......
Dear Diary,
I have been living here for 4 months now.
It's ok at first , but nearing the dying moments it really starts to get very frustating....or frussst as we'd call it. Never before had i enjoyed so much in a single place, never before had I such good friends, never before was my life so eventful, but never before had I gotten to hate a place so much.
This place can grow on you..and suddenly when you think you are a part of the system.....Ka-boom
.... and all that you were thinking is suddenly ...gone.
I think it is more because of the maggu culture that sort of permeates out through the walls of the institute.... If you are not a maggu .....thou shalt not survive tha onslaught of tests and practicals and labs and what not. I am of course proud to NOT be a maggu ...... isliye I suffer.
I know I know.... I'll miss this place like hell in the summer hols..... But, human are very unsatisfied organisms.... In summers they say there is too much heat.....In winters too much cold....
There is no spring good enough for humans.
The weather here is unbearable sometimes though it gets nicer in the evenings...
Right now, I am sweating head to toe.
Yours perspiringly.
Sam
I have been living here for 4 months now.
It's ok at first , but nearing the dying moments it really starts to get very frustating....or frussst as we'd call it. Never before had i enjoyed so much in a single place, never before had I such good friends, never before was my life so eventful, but never before had I gotten to hate a place so much.
This place can grow on you..and suddenly when you think you are a part of the system.....Ka-boom
.... and all that you were thinking is suddenly ...gone.
I think it is more because of the maggu culture that sort of permeates out through the walls of the institute.... If you are not a maggu .....thou shalt not survive tha onslaught of tests and practicals and labs and what not. I am of course proud to NOT be a maggu ...... isliye I suffer.
I know I know.... I'll miss this place like hell in the summer hols..... But, human are very unsatisfied organisms.... In summers they say there is too much heat.....In winters too much cold....
There is no spring good enough for humans.
The weather here is unbearable sometimes though it gets nicer in the evenings...
Right now, I am sweating head to toe.
Yours perspiringly.
Sam
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
...
The morning pitches bright;
I stand over
watching over the rebirth of the day and time
watching silently ; I pause and try
to decipher meaning in this moment of simplicity
when all the world is at its primal eventuality
I stare and I hope I'll forget the past
but invariably;as always;it comes rushing back
throwing me into the void obfuscating
gapeless and obliviating
I step onto those broken shards of time
these hurt me ever more now;
and as always I wonder how;
when if I am free of all that stood against.
and when my time on this earth is over.
will I ever be whole??
unscathed unharmed untouched undisturbed
innocent calm untiring unperturbed
will my suffering ever end or will I just
keep up my smiles to the world
hollow these are;laughter and smile;
these are not me;
and I am not them;
these are just for the sake of the world
gain acceptance; appease friends
and so I do try to make amends
but then again I falter and show
my real self
to someone I know
and they have a fleeting glimpse
into the deepest recessses of my heart
every now and then
they come and say
"why don't you let all this out?"
I smile; the fake smile; and I try to show
It's not always what you are that holds
It's what you achieve in this short period of life that counts
It's not even your character that amounts
Itself; on everyone else
It's finally how you affected the world you lived
did you try your best to get someone to smile...
did you give your best to keep the life alive...
"you did all this and yet you suffered"
my friend; understand;now it hardly matters
"the shards still hurt you; I mean"
shards are built for hurting ;you see
"it's no use living in the past"
I know I know I knew it last;
"it's a blaze and it will consume you whole
...this pain will take its toll"
before they can speak I tell them this
it is the pain I felt that makes me as it is
I remeber how it hurt and I try and I try
never again should anyone cry
for the same reason for the same thing
this is not suffering 'tis a lesson
of life that I learnt
you are asking me to forget what I learnt
you are asking me to cover where it burnt
no my friend no no no
my life is an open book you know
my experiences are for everyone to share
my successes and failures and risks and dares
what use is life if it it's of use to noone
what is the use if we sit moping and sigh
my friend has no answer...
and when i think of it
neither do i...
the morning is now over
the time of rebirth has gone away.
I am me again
and I will stay this way.
-Samar
these are not me;
and I am not them;
these are just for the sake of the world
gain acceptance; appease friends
and so I do try to make amends
but then again I falter and show
my real self
to someone I know
and they have a fleeting glimpse
into the deepest recessses of my heart
every now and then
they come and say
"why don't you let all this out?"
I smile; the fake smile; and I try to show
It's not always what you are that holds
It's what you achieve in this short period of life that counts
It's not even your character that amounts
Itself; on everyone else
It's finally how you affected the world you lived
did you try your best to get someone to smile...
did you give your best to keep the life alive...
"you did all this and yet you suffered"
my friend; understand;now it hardly matters
"the shards still hurt you; I mean"
shards are built for hurting ;you see
"it's no use living in the past"
I know I know I knew it last;
"it's a blaze and it will consume you whole
...this pain will take its toll"
before they can speak I tell them this
it is the pain I felt that makes me as it is
I remeber how it hurt and I try and I try
never again should anyone cry
for the same reason for the same thing
this is not suffering 'tis a lesson
of life that I learnt
you are asking me to forget what I learnt
you are asking me to cover where it burnt
no my friend no no no
my life is an open book you know
my experiences are for everyone to share
my successes and failures and risks and dares
what use is life if it it's of use to noone
what is the use if we sit moping and sigh
my friend has no answer...
and when i think of it
neither do i...
the morning is now over
the time of rebirth has gone away.
I am me again
and I will stay this way.
-Samar
An Abstract Poem...
Tear me oh Brother from this torrid sky.
Where these rays burn upon me I don't know why.
Tear me oh Sister from this fledgling boughs.
Who restrain me and put be back; ever and now.
Tear me oh Friend from this lake of doom.
I am drowning; don't make let it be my tomb.
Tear me oh Love from these stakes of desires.
Where my sanity is lost;my heart is on fire.
Tear me, oh Anger from these frigid pools of Ice.
It is only your heat that will melt my gneiss.
Tear me oh Fear from these seals of surety.
I have become peaceable to the limts of obscurity.
Tear me oh Myself from the chains I wrought.
The pain was bought but the suffering was not.
Tear me, oh Tear me, just Tear me away.
So I may once again just wander astray.
Where these rays burn upon me I don't know why.
Tear me oh Sister from this fledgling boughs.
Who restrain me and put be back; ever and now.
Tear me oh Friend from this lake of doom.
I am drowning; don't make let it be my tomb.
Tear me oh Love from these stakes of desires.
Where my sanity is lost;my heart is on fire.
Tear me, oh Anger from these frigid pools of Ice.
It is only your heat that will melt my gneiss.
Tear me oh Fear from these seals of surety.
I have become peaceable to the limts of obscurity.
Tear me oh Myself from the chains I wrought.
The pain was bought but the suffering was not.
Tear me, oh Tear me, just Tear me away.
So I may once again just wander astray.
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